Am I Alone In This?

bakerstbabe221 · 2017-05-11 15:10:07

Cardiophilia means to have a love and appreciation of the heart.

I don't understand people who claim to be cardiophiles who want to damage their heart like the user on HBP asking how they can give themselves a heart condition to be "happy with their body" as if having a (presumably) healthy heart is giving them body dysphoria.

I don't understand dark cardiophilia where people LOVE the idea or ripping someone's heart out, or stabbing/shooting someone on the heart, or pushing someone into heart failure and all of their other weird things. To me, these are cardiophiles. This isn't a heart fetish either. It's a death fetish.

Am I the only one who thinks/feels this way? I think if you love and appreciate something you should want to take care of it.

Last edited by bakerstbabe221 (2017-05-11 15:10:43)

Diff · 2017-05-11 15:22:47

I'm pretty much with you, I think. I'm perfectly content listening to a perfectly content heartbeat. Lots of people like heartbeats that race at the speed of sound or skipping around like it could stop at any moment. It's not my thing, but they're cardiophiles too. And to be honest hearing a tortured sounding heartbeat makes it easy to appreciate all the times your heart works flawlessly and tirelessly to keep you going. About the dark cardiophiles though, I don't think they're any different. I just think they pushed the edge of that spectrum a little further past speedy/skipping to just plain dying. Although I guess death's on both ends of the spectrum, I haven't heard of any dark cardiophiles who prefer hearts that slip peacefully into death.

Anyway, point I'm trying to make is this: I think they're still cardiophiles. I think they're just cardiophile extremists. And just because they are attracted to that far end of the spectrum doesn't mean they don't or can't still appreciate the stuff closer to the middle.

monkey · 2017-05-11 16:10:43

I really don't understand why anyone would actively WANT a heart condition. Sounds like those whackjob "trans-abled" people who believe they're handicapped people living in a healthy body. (I'm not making this up. These people actually exist). Those guys need professional help. It is not normal or healthy to want to be sick or injured.

heartbro95 · 2017-05-11 16:31:35

Long text post incoming.

I do have a fascination with the heart sounds of people with heart conditions, but the thing is... a lot of times, these files by people who make recordings of their excessively fast/skipping hearts are just novelties to me at most. Sure, I can think about lots of ways that the heart might react to trauma or stress, maybe imagining how quickly the heart function degrades when it is injured, but, at best I only think of those as "what-ifs" or hypothetical medical scenarios, and I always do so in the context of "how do we fix this".

A few years ago, when I was starting out in my heart interest, I was like lots of people in this community, liking fast hearts from people around my age, but this changed as time went on. The more I saw these "dark" cardiophiles and their fascinations around the community, I became feeling somewhat disconnected, as if I couldn't understand what they were into. I felt horrified at the thought of deliberately wanting to fiddle around with someone's heart outside of the proper medical/surgical context. My interest evolved over time to prefer normal, resting heartbeats over anything else.

Part of this has to do with a very personal thing. I know a very close friend with a serious progressive heart condition (likely a cardiomyopathy) and while he's been a source of inspiration, my being friends with such a person and knowing quite a bit about their daily struggles is making me feel distanced from a lot of these people who share this kind of interest. I wish no one else had to deal with the things that this guy's going through as a result of his condition.

I have a very morbid curiosity, but along these lines I do feel like my heart interest has something to do with wanting to enjoy the moments we're still alive in. For those people who already have heart conditions who are making files, I appreciate them, mostly because in their recordings, I hear a heart that's still trying its best to make things work. For those who're willing to go further than that, sure, I appreciate experimentation, but I do want to at least know that these people somehow know what they're doing... I just hope that in these situations, their fetishizing the "thrill" that comes with such a violent or self-destructive scenario doesn't overtake them too much.

shyboy1123 · 2017-05-11 16:39:42

I don't get them either, but I won't criticize either. There's a difference between dark fantasies and real life.

Diff · 2017-05-11 16:58:36

shyboy1123 wrote:

I don't get them either, but I won't criticize either. There's a difference between dark fantasies and real life.

Definitely can not forget or diminish this. Plenty of people, men and women, have rape fantasies. And plenty of those people are still absolutely horrified by the idea of rape in real life, because fantasy and reality are totally separate.

That said trying to damage your heart is definitely crossing that line from fantasy to reality and is a very bad idea.

Deleted user #620 · 2017-05-11 21:02:36

Same. I just can't understand what's appealing (and even less arousing) in ripping someone's heart out, stabbing it, making it stop or whatever. It feels wrong to me, but to each their own I guess, as long as no dangerous fantasy is acted upon IRL and no one gets hurt...

I do love fast and skippy heartbeats a lot though, incredible how such a small organ can work and how much it can endure. Diseased hearts are interesting to listen to as well, but a little sad for the people who have them and make me glad my own heart is healthy (I'm almost shameful for sometimes being disappointed I don't get more PVCs, idiot me).

But some cardiophiles just make me scared... They do such dangerous and extreme things to their hearts I'm afraid they will not live long... I just see it this way: if we have this interest in the heart, it is to make it last, right? Not to die from Vfib at the third recording we make because we wanted to go way too fast or way too skippy... Sure, it can be fun to feel and to listen to but... No one will be able to enjoy your heart anymore if it just stops And if you survive, you'll make yourself ill for the rest of your life and regret it. A heart is important, don't mistreat it <3

Last edited by EstebanM (2017-05-12 14:20:06)

Kay-Ember · 2017-05-11 21:54:04

Never really got the apeal of the heart death thing either. I'd go on cardiophile blogs on Tumblr and see pics and gifs of women (its always us women) being shot, stabbed, ripped out, ect. Hell, even saw someone reblog a chest x-ray showing the heart with the text going something like "i'd like to have my hand grasping that heart". Like....wtf? They claim to love the heart, and yet they want it stopped, removed, punctured, grabbed with bare hands, ect? Sounds more like you hate the heart.

Deleted user #158 · 2017-05-11 22:47:59

This particular person says in their profile that they are trans, asexual, and a cardiophile.

Forgive my ignorance, but is it even possible to be a cardiophile and asexual?

Last edited by patthedrummer (2017-05-11 22:49:47)

HBrhody · 2017-05-11 23:12:07

I have a dark heart fantasy...FANTASY. Love and appreciation does not apply; it's fantasy. "B-b-but...if you f-fantasize about it, y-you might really d-d-do it." Sure. OK. And it IS a heart fetish, because the heart is the focus. My neighbor has cardiophilia; she loves drawing hearts, wearing hearts on her clothing, and doing other fun things with hearts. I do not have a "love" for hearts; I have a heart fetish, otherwise known as having a partialism, for those in the psychology field. My heart fetish can be spooky, scary, and dark. (Safe spaces can't protect you from the dark side of the fetish.) I have a firm grip on reality, so the darkness remains in my fantasies. But, if I were ever to abandon my spirituality or say F you to morals...well then, that's a different story.

For the next week, everyone here should write down all the stuff they fantasize about. Then, we can all have a "serious" discussion (like they do on the news) about how angry and hateful and eeevil everyone ELSE is. Cheers.

Diff · 2017-05-12 02:02:39

BeatsAreGifts wrote:

And as far as rape fantasy? Dude- might feel very different if you have been raped and/or molested. No way that is cool to me in the least getting any kind of kicks off of imagining being raped. We are meant for so much better.

Literally nobody is going to disagree that people aren't meant for so much better. But I've even known people who have been raped who, even after being raped although I guess I didn't ever know them before getting raped, got off to rape fantasies. Fantasy != reality.

Keep in mind here I'm not speaking from experience. I only have past friend's experiences to go on here.

patthedrummer wrote:

This particular person says in their profile that they are trans, asexual, and a cardiophile.
Forgive my ignorance, but is it even possible to be a cardiophile and asexual?

Yeah, cardiophilia doesn't have to be sexual. Plenty of people are cardiophiles but don't have a cardio fetish, myself included. It's more of a calming, relaxing kind of thing than a giggity giggity kind of thing.

HBrhody · 2017-05-12 12:17:33

I believe a lot of people dance and tiptoe around “heart fetish” and identify as “cardiophile” because they, for whatever reason, don’t want others to think they find the heart erotic. Perhaps some people don’t like the fact that they are aroused by hearts, and wish to keep it a secret. Some people are just in plain denial. We are all lumped together here with all different views and perspectives on the heart, and everything else for that matter. I can’t claim to even remotely understand how someone can listen to a heart of the opposite sex and not find it erotic, or listen to the heart of the same sex and not feel icky about it. There are straight people here who enjoy the hearts of the same sex. I have no way of understanding any of this, because I’m me, not them. Some people only like the hearts of people around the same age as them, other people don’t care about the age. There are people here who actually take offense by others who differ in their heart views. I enjoy, and try to get what I can out of, all the different perspectives even though I can’t connect with or understand them. Not understanding can suck. *Waving fist at the sky* “Damn you for all these differences.”

Hrtbeat86bpm · 2017-05-14 20:15:35

Wanting to give yourself heart problems just for your own enjoyment is just strange. I've never heard of anything like that. But I'm not going to sit here and say "Hey, you can't do that" because it's obviously their choice if they want to do that. As far as dark heart fetish stuff goes, I'm not into stopping hearts from beating such as stabbings, shootings or even defibrillation. It does nothing for me. I am however into heart removal scenes from horror movies and TV shows, but only if the heart is still beating while in the person's hand after it gets ripped out. The heart is the only aspect of the scene I care about. To me, the dark heart fetish stuff is a heart fetish since it is dealing with the heart. I don't consider it a death fetish. I just prefer seeing and hearing the heart beating rather than it just stop altogether. I tend to think of heart removal scenes as open heart surgery or watching the heart beating on an ultrasound machine.

But to say that someone isn't a cardiophile just because they like an aspect of the fetish that you don't like or deem incomprehensible is like saying that someone doesn't actually like music just because they don't like a certain band or genre. I don't like neck visibles and irregular heartbeats, does that mean I'm not a cardiophile? Not everyone is going to like or dislike the same aspects of the fetish as you do. And sadly, that's what splits everyone up. Just because one person likes a certain part of something that someone else doesn't like, right away they find it offensive and start talking trash about it as if it's the cause of the black plague.

Last edited by Hrtbeat86bpm (2017-05-14 20:26:34)

bakerstbabe221 · 2017-05-14 23:58:25

patthedrummer wrote:

This particular person says in their profile that they are trans, asexual, and a cardiophile.
Forgive my ignorance, but is it even possible to be a cardiophile and asexual?

Asexual isn't a lack of arousal or interest for every person on the ace spectrum (yes there's a whole spectrum with different degrees and types just like homosexuality). Asexual simply means you do not experience sexual attraction. Sexual attraction is not the same thing as arousal.

Ricadams · 2017-05-15 20:26:49

I don't have an issue with fast heartbeats so long as the situation isn't potentially life-threatening - light exercise is fine, but purposing pushing yourself to the limit just to upload something? Not so much. I'm also not a big fan of breath hold vids, especially if the person looks like they are convulsing as they hold their breaths.

I'm not into shooting or stabbing a heart, but I must admit I'm drawn to heart removal scenes in fiction. I think some of it stems from being fascinated with seeing an actual heart, to see it beating with my own eyes. It's just I rather keep that as fantasy. I do watch heart surgery vids now and then, but that's with the idea they are allowed to be shown since the operation was a success and the person being operated on survived. I doubt any hospital would make such a vid public if something went wrong.

T145 · 2017-05-20 17:40:22

My understanding is that it becomes a power play, which is, from what I've seen a good bit of where the harming bit comes from.

Can't say that I can understand the wanting to give yourself a heart condition, short of wanting to be 'unique' (but I'm biased there).

patthedrummer wrote:

Forgive my ignorance, but is it even possible to be a cardiophile and asexual?

Yep. You can have a sexual orientation (what sex you're attracted to), and a sexual preference (what you like, or prefer). An asexual might not be attracted to either sex, but still have their own preferences in a sexual situation.

I've mentioned this elsewhere, but here would do as well: Cardiophilia is more like an umbrella term, where you can have almost every sub-category under the sun that can go into it, but the term is too broad to be used accurately. So those who enjoy stopping hearts and whatnot, are more their own little sub-category than extremists as such, much like how sex has all these little niches and things, including things which are well out of the norm (but still fit in under sex, rather than sexual extremism).Even the less extreme variants would probably fit under their own sub-category, as well.

Last edited by T145 (2017-05-20 17:41:22)

orang_utan_dean · 2017-05-20 22:03:25

This is where I sometimes find myself a little conflicted.

As my interest in hearts is largely scientific (to the extent that it's a field that I'm interested in to the point of going back to school to persue a more medically themed career), I do find listening to people who already have heart conditions intensely fascinating...particularly if they are especially erratic. I look to it as increasing my knowledge of the various sounds it makes under differing conditions and as other people have mentioned before, marvelling at just how durable it can be. To that extent, if I'm listening to someone and they suggest trying things to induce irregular rhythms, I cautiously support them doing that if they are comfortable doing so, although I don't encourage them to overdo it and start getting concerned if more extreme techniques are used.

To that extent I also find heart surgeries and things fascinating things, including the thought of being able to hold someone's beating heart in my hands in that situation if needbe...the idea of literally being able to hold someone's life in your hands like that is quite a thrill.

I have explored some of the darker areas of the interest, including extreme tachycardias/fibrillation and life threatening situations, but I've never been able to fully engage in roleplaying or fantasising about that with people I've attempted it with because of things that have happened to me throughout my life that suddenly hit me part way through and bring a flood of really bad emotions back.

I guess at the end of the day doing dangerous things to your heart like that is to some people what extreme sports are to others - like doing a parkour run along the rooftops of the city several feet above the ground where one slip could send you plunging to your death, or scaling the side of a mountain without any safety ropes, or those videos on Youtube of people on bikes doing insane stunts. Weirdly enough, some people feel more alive the closer to death they are perceived to be. It's not for me and it's something I don't condone, but given the number of humans walking the earth at the moment, the potential for people thinking up new ways of pushing their boundaries are seemingly endless!

Diva · 2017-06-07 12:21:37

I read that post too the other day. I think the thing about HBP is there is a lot of praise for people who put interesting files out there. I remember maybe 7 or 8 years ago when the site was very active I would share and people would request you do certain things for different results. I was young and naive and loved the attention I got and tried not to think about what the others were "getting" out of it. I never had a problem with doing pushes or breathholds. Skips were exciting. Only doing it every so often can't be harmful could it? Well that was until recently.
I was fairly fit last year. I was hiking up mountains, doing mud runs basically anything active. All of a sudden what was easy of me last year became the hardest thing ever. I couldn't walk up a hill without getting tired. I was playing tennis one day and ran from the back of the court to the net and almost passed out from light headedness. I finally got it checked out when I started getting a lot of palpitations. I had one night where my heart was skipping beats for 2 mins straight. Something that was once exciting was now scary. Turns out I was severely iron deficient. While not a heart problem, it still impacted it. The exhaustion that I felt made me think my heart was broken. I can't imagine anyone wanting something that makes your body like that. My condition was reversible and soon I'll hopefully be back to where I was, but it horrifies me to think someone would want to live like that for the rest of their lives, that's if they make it long...

Marshall · 2017-06-07 20:23:41

Wow. I had no idea others shared my opinion on this. I think its incredibly stupid to torture or punish your heart just to please someone or to get a ton of comments or likes. I have a heart condition and its no picnick. It hits at the most inopportune times and its exhausting when it skips for days and pounds and races for no reason. Take care of your heart

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#1 2017-05-11 15:10:07

Am I Alone In This?

#2 2017-05-11 15:22:47

Re: Am I Alone In This?

#3 2017-05-11 16:10:43

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#4 2017-05-11 16:31:35

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#5 2017-05-11 16:39:42

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#6 2017-05-11 16:58:36

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#8 2017-05-11 21:02:36

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#9 2017-05-11 21:54:04

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#10 2017-05-11 22:47:59

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#11 2017-05-11 23:12:07

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#12 2017-05-12 02:02:39

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#13 2017-05-12 12:17:33

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#14 2017-05-14 20:15:35

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#15 2017-05-14 23:58:25

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#16 2017-05-15 20:26:49

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#17 2017-05-20 17:40:22

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#18 2017-05-20 22:03:25

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#19 2017-06-07 12:21:37

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#20 2017-06-07 20:23:41

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